Modern | Family Halloween Folgen [verified]

Cut to Alex, sitting in the corner, staring at nothing.

Fine. You be the Tin Man. No singing. Just silent, metallic judgment. That’s basically you at a party anyway.

(rushing in) It’s not broken! It’s performance art . The horror is your own unfulfilled potential !

(walking in wearing a black cat costume, but also holding a small plastic scythe) I’m a vengeance cat . I’m going to trick-or-treat at the neighbor’s who didn’t return our tupperware last year.

(adjusting his eyepatch) Manny is going as a “deconstructed existential poem.” I don’t know what that means, but he’s been staring at a single black turtleneck for three hours. And Joe is a hot dog. A very angry hot dog.

(to camera, whispering) Claire thinks I’m on air cannon duty. But I’ve been secretly building an illusion hallway. You walk through, and a mirror makes it look like your own head gets chopped off. It’s not scary. It’s elegant . She’ll cry tears of joy. Or fog machine irritation. Same thing, really.

I’ve been married to Gloria for eight years. A little air doesn’t scare me.

Cut to Phil. He is wearing a “World’s Okayest Magician” T-shirt and is tangled in a spider web, trying to free a struggling remote-control rat.